GAYLETTER

Linda Simpson is a true drag legend. Girl has been around longer than we’ve been alive. She’s seen it all, and done it all. This Thursday she premieres her new show: ‘The Drag Explosion.’ It’s essentially a very entertaining slideshow featuring her collection of photos of New York City’s drag scene from the late 1980s to the mid ’90s. During these years “Linda took hundreds of just-for-fun snapshots. Her vivid and intimate photos capture the most colorful characters of their day as they joyfully pushed the boundaries of gender expression.” The show offers us the chance to hop in a time machine and “journey back to the seminal East Village scene (including the legendary Pyramid Club and the outdoor drag festival Wigstock), nightlife adventures galore (at the Limelight, Palladium and other mega-clubs), and drag’s remarkable and triumphant burst into the mainstream.” For all you Drag Race fans, this is one show you don’t want to miss — Linda is dragendary, RESPECT.  —tom

The vocalist and hilarious performer Amber Martin is closing her show ‘Stoned Soul’ this week at 54 Below and you shouldn’t miss it. This time around the soul cuntress is going to perform “a collection of the best songs ever written by acclaimed singer/songwriter Laura Nyro.” She will also be joined by some “superior musicians.” I know this is off topic, but Amber looooves getting naked in public, I respect her even more because of it; a singing talent is one thing, but taking your pussy out in public really takes it to the next level. We have a feeling in this show she’ll be fully clothed, but you never know... The New Yorker recently named Amber one of New York’s Top 10 performers, which is cool, but we already knew that, a loooong time ago.  —Abi

So we heard Beth Ditto (of Gossip) got arrested last Sunday in Portland for disorderly conduct. Apparently she caused a scene at a local bar. I mean whatever, lots of girls behave crazy on the weekend. As far as I’m concerned if you are as talented as Beth you can do whatever you want— get drunk, punch an asshole, throw a drink at an annoying girl, it’s all good, someone has to keep shit trashy out there. According to the Huffington Post, Ditto “walked out in the middle of the street, threw off her shoes and purse and screamed OBAMA! OBAMA!” before the cops came. I don’t see anything wrong with that. Sounds fun. Anyways, if you want to have even more fun, here’s an opportunity to see the trouble-maker herself in concert at XLS (the new XL Saturday). Presented by Brandon Voss, Jared Needle & Patrick Crough in association with Christina Visca, there’s an opening set by British queen Jodie Harsh and DJ set by Tony Moran. If you haven’t seen Dito perform, then you haven’t seen a real lesbian throw it down on stage. Bitch is dynamite!  —Abi

We went to Justin Vivian Bond is Mx America last Saturday at Joe’s Pub and let me tell you V was on fire. Justin created a beauty pageant where V was the only contestant and the only winner—if only all pageants were so self-empowering. It was a much more calm Justin than we are used to, V was like a truth beauty queen. V started the show by modeling silently for two whole minutes. There were projections, and video interludes, even a part of the show where V ran through the audience spraying V’s new fragrance ‘The Afternoon of a Faun.’ We felt like we were at the Macy’s makeup counter, on 34th st., except the fragrance actually smelled nice. It was a killer show, if you’re a fan of JVB it’s not one to miss. Bitch just got back from Australia, and you know V didn’t fly coach, V gave us a first class performance — 22nd century style.  —Abi

I mean, just fuck me in the butt and shoot glitter all over my tits if this isn’t the gayest thing to happen since Hugh Jackman hosted the Tonys—Liza Minnelli and Alan Cumming are performing for two nights at Town Hall. “This is a transfer of their two sold-out shows in Fire Island’s historic Ice Palace nightclub” Ok, so scratch what I just said—Liza and Alan performing on Fire Island—I think that is the official definition of ‘gay’ in the Merriam-Webster dictionary. So what are these two homos planning for their show? Well I’m glad you asked. The pair will duet on familiar songs from “Cabaret”  and Liza will “dip into her repertoire of signature songs known the world over. Alan will perform his renditions of songs—from Annie Lennox to his own original songs. These two old friends will also interact on stage together—sharing stories, songs, and banter— of their adventures in life and show-business.” It’s a pricey ticket but not really when you think about what you’re getting. Alan I see in my gym locker room, like all the time, but Liza, they only wheel that old dear out once every couple of years. It’s kind of a big deal.  —tom

Joey Arias is one of our favorite performers of all time. Currently he’s in the second week of his residency at Joe’s Pub. This Sunday he has a super special guest. Her name is Flotilla DeBarge (that fierce bitch has been around forever) but you may have heard of her from the time she was arrested for getting into a brawl with a couple of patron’s at a club in the Meatpacking District (it was on Gawker.) But she’s also a great performer, with a powerful stage presence. I reckon she and Joey will have a gay ol’ time together. Don’t forget to use the special code at the bottom for a discounted ticket. And make sure you pay attention when she’s singing, girl is clearly not one to piss off!  —tom

According to the Mayan calendar, the world is going to end this Friday. I guess the organizers of this event are hopeful we’ll still be around. To be honest with you, I can’t think of a better way to spend my last hours than watching Joey Arias perform. I have a feeling Joey knows how to go out with a BANG. She has probably been planning this all her life. End of the World is presented in association with Earl Dax. Music direction & piano by Thomas Bartlett (aka Doveman), with special guests: the “glamorously gender-bent” Pixie Harlots, “the ethereal theramin player” Cornelius Loy and performance artist Narcissister. If you haven’t packed your bags for the end of the world, get to it, you don’t want to go to the other side looking like a sloppy mess, I heard a rumor the Mayans are real bitches.  —Abi

Remember when Joan’s hot hubby raped her on the floor of the office? Remember when Roger took acid and ended up tripping his balls off in the bathtub? Remember when Pete fucked that Gilmore Girl on the floor of her living room moments before her husband got home? Remember when Sally got her period for the first time at the Natural History Museum? It feels like Mad Men hasn’t been on the air for years. In reality it was only March that the show took a hiatus to prep for the final season. If you’re in need of a quick Peggy, Don and Roger fix, there’s always Angela Di Carlo’s Mad Men Spoof The Mad World of Miss Hathaway. Every year they do an awesome Xmas special written and performed by some talented folks, such as Mike Albo, Adam Dugas, David Ilku, William Jay Kahn, Heather Litteer, Jill Pangallo, Casey Spooner, Kyle Supley, Gia Mele, Ede Thurrell with musical accompaniment by Kyle (Special K) Forester. I’m about as excited as Peggy, when she smoked weed with that chick from Girls at that loft in the Village before the police busted it up.  —tom