GAYLETTER

Besides redheads and shark attack victims, and the recently burned, and those with Eremikophobia (fear of sand), who doesn’t love the beach? And who doesn’t love a party? Clearly not us. Which is why we were so excited to hear about this Sunday’s beach party at the Far Rockaways. It has everything you could want from a beach event...even drag queens. It’s called ‘Hissy Fit’ and along said drag queens (Untitled Queen  and Lady Simon) there’s live performances by North America, Ca-The-Drals, plus DJ Sets by Jessamess, Scot Bowman and Pegasus. That’s one busy beach day. 8 hours in the sun isn’t for the fainthearted, so we recommend you cut out carbs for the rest of the week, buy a cute pair of swim trunks, and pick up some SPF 80. Oh and make sure you stay hydrated...beer doesn’t count.  —tom

Man we got so many options to chose from for this Saturday, it was hard to figure out what to choose, but hey, that’s our job, and we can only pick one. The more I read about this party the more confident I am that we’ve made the right decision picking it. First off, it’s in an apartment, which is always a fun, and often a kind of nuts place to throw a party, especially one open to the public (but we like that). Second there’s some serious talent involved, including performances by Gio Black Peter, Drrty Pharms, G.R. Zombie and Robot Moonjuice. Robot seems to bring his fan club with him wherever he goes, so expect plenty of wild party kids from Washington Heights smoking blunts and climbing the rafters when he goes live. Hosts include Puchy Loo, Johnny Castrati, Ziggy Blvck and Jesse Nova. There’s also “visuals” by Wyatt Burns and my favorite part is that it’s free and open to all ages, oh shit! I suggest you check ID’s before you make out with any cuties on the dancefloor as Gio told us “there should be lots of new young guns to play with.” Fucking an underage boy is way too easy these days. lol.  —tom

Josh Sparber’s Good Times at Eastern Bloc ended a couple of weeks ago, after a multi-year run, it was one of those local staples you’d go to on a Wednesday night to try and get laid. Eastern Bloc is just one of those bars that makes you think of sex. I guess the fact that they show vintage porn on the TV screens above the bar helps. Anyhoo, they’ve started this new party called ‘I’m Fucking Jesus’ (I think that’s a very nice name for a party, everyone talks about loving Jesus or believing in him, why not fucking him? He seemed like a horny guy and according to the images you see of him he seemed elegant and had really nice healthy hair). So where was I? Right, the party...so apparently this party is all about “sexy hairy beefcakes, sexy gogo men and $3 Jesus Juice shots,” and music by DJ Marc Isenhart (pictured) — sounds great! It’s a pretty straight forward event, so I’ll leave you with this one last thought provided by the organizers: “Foreskin me Father, for I have sinned.” Amen to that!  —Abi

Michael Glennon is from the ginger-otter community (don’t you love all the labels we queer people use?) He told me a while back about this party ‘Afterbeach,’ but now it’s finally happening.“It’s a BBQ, afternoon rage in a huge backyard.” Michael told me that he picked that location because “its real, and huge. Not hipster fake, it’s a good dive and it’s convenient for boys on bikes coming back from Riis Beach who live in Williamsburg or Greenpoint or even Bushwick.” The party has rotating hosts, this time they include Shane Shane and Bcalla. “The crowd tends to be Bushwick art kids — lotta drag queens in their boy looks.” Cute! You can bring your own food if you are picky like me (I prefer my meat to be fresh and to know where it came from) but if you buy their food be kind (it’s a “pay what you wish situation” — not a soup kitchen). Michael is so sweet and so generous — “I always lose money...”  he tells us. This party is ALL about having fun; we know a couple of promoters who could learn a thing or two about that.  —Abi

I am so curious about the name of this party: ‘Chicken and Diamonds.’ I’ve never thought about it before, but don’t those two things go so well together? The House of Field (made up of the stylists from the Patricia Field store) are presenting this party, and you know those bitches will bring a lot of glamour. Leo Gugu, who’s part of the Pat Field family, as well as the GAYLETTER family (cause you know we are forming a house at some point too), is going to be twirling and twerking until she can’t twerk and twirl no more (which if you know her will be some time). Anyways, this party seems to be packed with all the right ingredients. The super sexy AB Soto is going to be performing some of his new music and XEX Magazine is also hosting­ — With this crew, anything can happen. To get in simply say “Pat Field” at the door, and once inside, don’t forget to twerk, and twirl and twerk again!  —Abi

The lovely JD Samson (from the bands Le Tigre and MEN) has been doing this party for quite some time now, at this awesome location: Rusty Knot where you can see the sun set over the Hudson River. It’s a mixed LGBTQI party which means you can hang out with all sorts of people, even the bi-curious. They have an “amazing menu” of food that I haven’t tried yet, but we trust ‘em (LGBTQI people are pretty honest). This week Frankie Sharp and Michael Magnan are the main attractions, they’re both DJing. I went to the party’s FB page and they have an evocative invite with both DJ’s faces on it; it’s adorable. (It’s just as adorable to see their faces when I’m drunk at a party.) Expect a lovely sunset, free vodka from 4:00PM - 5:00PM, $2 shots and all kinds of queer people — it’s a great way to spend your Sunday. Trust me I’m part LGBTQI.  —Abi

We may have just had a massive Pride weekend, but surprise, surprise, it’s the 4th of July weekend! Jesus, summer really sneaks up on you. Abi and I are terrible at planning trips so this weekend we’ll probably be stuck in the city :( Luckily there’s plenty of fun stuff happening, like Hot Rabbit’s 2 year anniversary this Friday night. It’s at The Monster, which to be honest, is a bit of a shithole, but in many ways that’s part of it’s charm; accidently spill your drink? Oh well, no big deal, that floor has definitely had grosser things spilt on it. Besides, you can throw a party in a public restroom as long as you have the right people involved (just ask George Michael). Hot Rabbit has been voted by Paper magazine, Gothamist and Time Out as one of the best parties of 2013, so they’re clearly doing something right. This Friday, DJ’s TRx, Average Jo and Angel Boi will be spinning tracks until the special midnight show featuring Rye Rye. You don’t want to miss that bad lil bitch, that’s for sure.  —tom